50-pound Blanket

50-Pound Blanket is both an intimate self-portrait of me and a visual exploration of Utica, New York — a personal and revelatory journey, navigating anxiety and depression after transitioning from a 24-year military career to life as a full-time college student.

I turned to photography as a sort of therapy when I was in a dark place. It got me off the couch and out from under the 50-pound blanket that was my depression and anxiety. I went on long walks throughout Utica, NY — determined to make a portrait of the city known locally as "Shootica." I failed. Many months and more than 170 miles later, I realized that instead, I'd been unintentionally making a self-portrait the entire time.